Substitutes

Americans love substitutes. We accept them, we create them, and we approve of them. Our national economy thrives on them. Even our national security depends on them. Our daily lives are influenced by substitutes from the time we wake up in the morning to when we go to sleep at night. We even have a substitute for time called daylight saving time. Our language is full of substitutes. We shorten words to the barest minimum of characters which can still give meaning to our thoughts. Thx, ok, ty, ttfn, wtg are examples. We substitute nick names for real ones. We often use letters of the alphabet as a substitute for names of people such as FDR and OJ or grocery stores called H.E.B. Our government uses abbreviated words and letters to denote agencies.

We have even found a way to substitute some foods for the real thing. Splenda is a substitute for sugar. Canola oil is a chemical substitution for some oils. We patronize restaurants that give substitute choices for things on their menus.

Substitute teachers are part of our education system. We are constantly in search of new ways to substitute money. We went from substituting paper for coins to banking with checks, then graduated to plastic and currently we are attempting to substitute online services to replace the tangible substitutes in use now.

Our clothing is comprised of synthetics which are substitutes for wool, cotton and silk. Vinyl replaces leather. Our residences are partially built and decorated with synthetic woods and stones. Television and radio have substitute hosts. Pharmacies often substitute one medicine for another. The National Guard is a substitution used to augment the army. Injured soldiers are given substitute arms and legs to replace those lost. Doctors routinely transplant substituted organs for defective ones. We keep ourselves comfortable in substituted climates of heating and air conditioning.

Undoubtedly there are many more examples but these are just a few that crossed my mind when I watched a television commercial for Capital One credit card. It’s really amazing that we are so unaware of how the culture of our time is developing or that rules of American society are predicated on substitutions.

See Internet abbreviations at:
http://www.pulpchat.com/faq/faq215.php
See Government Acronyms at:
http://www.ulib.iupui.edu/subjectareas/gov/docs_abbrev.html
See Ingredient Substitutions at:
http://www.e-cookbooks.net/ingresub.htm
See a document listing Drug Substitutions at:
www.wiba.org/pdf/insurance/prescription/2006_formulary_list.pdf

Concoctions

I just finished making one of my food concoctions. I poured 1 cup boiling water over sugar free lime Jello and when it had cooled, added non fat plain yogurt until I liked the color. I figure that since I like lime Jello and yogurt regardless of fat content it will be edible. I usually follow tried and true recipes when cooking, but when I make concoctions, I never know how they will turn out. If possible I like to combine colors first and worry about taste later. Of course this tendency leads to lots of failures, but sometimes I get lucky. Occasionally I get nods of approval, and on occasion I even get rave comments, but when I have a failure, it’s usually colossal.

Examples of color combinations are juicy oranges, cucumber slices and red onion rings or tossed pieces of cantaloupe, pineapple chunks, green seedless grapes, and ham cubes with ginger ale poured over all.

I am not the cook my mother was. I learned how to make many of the recipes she made for the family but I don’t have the touch of creativity that she had in the kitchen. She could throw things together and call it her ‘Thunder’, and have people lining up for seconds. My brother, Mickey, followed in her footsteps when it came to food. His two passions were listening to opera and gourmet cooking. My sister Esther has Mom’s highly developed sense of taste but she doesn’t exercise it on a variety of foods. She is not adventuresome when it comes to trying new dishes or foreign foods.

I’m lucky to have my son as my taster when I make concoctions. When I tell him that I’ve just made something worth his attention, would he like to taste, he always asks what it’s called, (obviously a sneaky way to find out the ingredients). Often times I would rather not say, but knowing his dislike of certain foods, I either tell him or give hints.

Recently I came up with a concoction that was several days in the making. I had stored some bollixed up cream cheese frosting in the fridge and was trying to decide whether to throw it out or try to make something with it. I had not measured quantities and the mess had gotten too sweet and slightly discolored from too much vanilla.

In a moment of brilliance I thought of mixing it with peanut butter. I started with globs of peanut butter and kept adding and tasting but the mixture never lost its blandness. I put it in the fridge for a few days while I pondered how best to use it.

A week later I was on the verge of tossing it in the garbage when another moment of brilliance hit. I decided to make carrot muffins from a box mix and frost them with the cheese mixture. Because I had put only a small amount of batter in each cup as a base for the frosting, they looked rather skimpy after baking. I heaped more frosting mixture on each muffin and re-baked them. When I finally quit fooling around with them, they actually looked quite appetizing. When I phoned my son and said I had made something for him he asked what it was… I just said ‘my thunder’. He did say later that they were very good, a little sweet, but good.