El Rancho S-OH-S Part 11 by KimB

Episode Red Light Green Light

One of the many stories and lessons about construction is that nothing goes in a straight line. Everything wiggles and wobbles and just when you think all the ducks are finally lined up, something goes pear-shaped.

All those fix-it-up/DIY TV shows bypass this aspect. That last thing they want you to realize is that it IS "A Long Way to Tipperary"¹ and you aren't going to get there any time soon.

Sometimes, the wobble is so great it just launches the whole project into orbit.

En attendant Godot²


Act 1 Scene 11 Statues³
sound effect: mechanical hum

Green Light	Purchase Property
Red Light	Escrow and Closing
Green Light	Property Title Completed
Green Light	County Requirements Research
Red Light	Restrictions Override Required
Green Light	County Override Deposit Accepted
Green Light	Utility Power Request
Red Light	Utility Work Deposit Required
Green Light	Utility Work Deposit Accepted
Red Light	Utility Power Review #001
Green Light	Power Review #001 Completed
Red Light	Utility Power Review #002
Green Light	Power Review #002 Completed
Red Light	Utility Power Review #003
Green Light	Power Review #003 Completed
Red Light	House Electrical Load Required	HOLD
Red Light	Site Plan Design
Green Light	Site Plan Design Completed
Red Light	House Plan Design
Green Light	House Plan Design Completed
Red Light	Electrical Load Analysis
Green Light	Electrical Load Report	HOLD CLEARED
Green Light	Utility Electrical Load Calculations
Red Light	Transformer Insufficient Capacity	HOLD
Red Light	Transformer Capacity Resolution	3-18 MONTHS
Red Light	Building Loan Application
Green Light	Application Submitted
Red Light	Additional Documents #001
Green Light	Documents #001 Submitted
Red Light	Additional Documents #002
Green Light	Documents #002 Submitted
Red Light	Additional Documents #003
Green Light	Documents #003 Submitted
Green Light	Loan Documents Completed
Red Light	Costs Exceed Budget	HARD STOP
Red Light	Building Loan	WAITING FOR GODOT

End Act 1 Scene 11 Statues
sound effect: shredding paper

1. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/It%27s_a_Long_Way_to_Tipperary
   "It's a Long Way to Tipperary" is a music hall song written by Henry James "Harry" Williams and co-credited to Jack Judge around January 1912.
2. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Waiting_for_Godot
   Waiting for Godot is a play by Samuel Beckett and is a translation of his own original French-language play, En attendant Godot
3. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Statues_(game)
   Statues (also known as Red Light, Green Light in the United States, and Grandmother's Footsteps in the United Kingdom) is a popular children's game, often played in different countries. How the game is played varies throughout different regions of the world.

Lonely Power Pole
Dirt Pile