" .. but I digress .. " ~ A new series by I.M. Forreal ~ Treasure Hunting - Episode 1 - Anno Nymus

 

“.. but I digress ..”

A new series by – I.M Forreal

Treasure Hunting - Episode 1

Treasure hunting has been my life .. even though I didn’t realize it until after I had actually found several great treasures …

Granddad A used to say .. “ if you want rabbits … then go where the rabbits are ! “ … and I have come across many rabbits … by looking in the right places ..

He was himself a great treasure hunter, and in fact sparked my lifelong interest in lost treasures and found riches ! He could see value in everything, and treasures everywhere !

He staked out some mine claims …in Panamint Valley (next door to Death Valley) and sold several mining claims for talc and gypsum. He was a gen-u-wine prospector … but knew his way around collectibles or an antique or two ..

I can recall being rapt when he told tales of the Lost Dutchman mine … and old Spanish Gold Fleets lost in hurricanes … he taught me geology basics .. and for many years I was an avid 'rock-hound' .. collecting many geodes and fine gemstones ...but I digress …

I found my own niche in rare stringed musical instruments. I have collected and possessed some of the rarest .. we never really 'own' these treasures .. just stewards to care for under our watch .. then pass on for others to enjoy.

This series will cover several great instruments that I have had over the years .. all of special interest or note .. and worthy of museums … although my personal sense is that great instruments need to be played not just put in display cases .. or locked away – hidden from use or enjoyment by others !

Great instruments need to be played to keep the woods active, alive and flexible. That’s why great acoustic instruments 'warm up' or 'loosen up' after being brought out of the case and played for 30 minutes or so .. it's almost like they shift into another gear.

I once saw several Stradivarius violins on display beside each other in London in 1971.. each cocooned in a glass box .. you could walk around and see and marvel at the woods and workmanship .. but what you really wanted was to HEAR them!!

The museum did offer tape recordings of each .. you could listen to on funky “old school” pilot style headphones – after pushing a button .. alas, a cassette tape was poor consolation to the real in the room magnificent sounds of the live actual instruments! ( pre digital in 1970's).

I attended a chamber music series in France when I attended University there in the 70's ** .. and the small gatherings of 80-200 people .. allowed me to talk to the players backstage after the concert .. many with Stradivarius or other renowned instruments .. and was pleasantly surprised at how I was urged to play a note or two on those precious instruments .. thus I have actually held and struck a few notes on several Stradivarius violins ..

I once rode the train from LA to Tucson .. and sat next to a concert violinist .. who was traveling .. with a Stradivarius and and Amati and a Guarnieri .. !!! He let me play all 3 !!! .. I have so often been in the right place at the right time !

The first item up in this blog series is a magnificent 'attic' find .. from an estate .. it is rare to find them so completely original .. with the patina and condition virtually untouched from original …albeit some funky old time repairs from the 1920's were done – and whilst looking rough are actually quite sound. The condition is playable, but some elements are fragile .. like the - 'tortoise shell ' pick-guard inlayed into the top – which has shrunken into several pieces and could easily knocked off .. but the mandolin sits just as found.

It even arrived in tune … in an ill fitting wooden case for an electric mandolin .. *** I de - tuned it to remove tension on the top, and it has been on display – but un-played ever since.

I recently put this rare treasure on the market .. and here is the updated synopsis I wrote for the next owner .. 

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Orville Gibson's Work Shop circa 1903

(note the blond top mandolin on the workbench )

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1903 Gibson “Artist” F Mandolin

The story of this Gibson Artist 'Florentine' scroll mandolin, made in 1903

Probably the 324th original instrument 'Hand Made' by Orville Gibson?

The Factory Order Number (FON) is 324 !

This came from an estate in New Mexico – I purchased it around 2005 ish – 'as is'-- and it is still … just 'as found'! - I have not even changed the strings .. it even arrived in tune ! A true 'Attic Find' ! The story I was told from the estate manager is as follows...

The owner – a woman - bought this new from a mandolin teacher - who was also the Gibson representative at the time . This is early 1900's .. she was infatuated with the teacher – and took up the mandolin so she could be with him. They took lessons on the front porch so they could be together – as was the proper way back in the day. She was really in love !

She bought it from him, and took lessons – and they eventually married.

Apparently she played it every day – in his memory – after he passed away some years ago ! She played it, I'm told, right up until a few weeks before her passing at the age of 103 !

The fingerboard is well played .. all the way up to 'Florida' over the sound hole !!

She must have been quite a virtuoso... and it is a delightful love story entwined with a wonderful and historic “all original” mandolin ! A rare 'barn find' for sure ! What we all dream of finding .. a genuine treasure !

The modern custom rectangle hard case was acquired separately a few years later. 

It had no original case.***

October 2021

         * * *

I have many other tales of the rare and found .. and the almost caught .. it has been a great adventure …

I tell you, nothing beats the excitement of walking into an old obscure .. forgotten back street pawn shop in the 1960's.. run by a cigar smoking old guy … who says .. I have some old guitars in the back that never got claimed after the war .. take a look and see if anything is of interest ..!? … and brother was there ever !!!! .. watch for that story coming soon...

I have handled some of the most amazing stringed instruments .. which always seem to find me !! ?!!?

I finally had to stop going into old pawn shops .. too much great stuff and never enough money ! .. the pieces that slipped away for lack of $20 to put it on 'hold-layaway' .. oh my .. the stories ..

and yet .. there are plenty of success stores to share .. and here is one that is delightful .. fun .. proves that the great treasures and rarities can still be found .. just by keeping an eye open .. and knowing what you are looking at .. !

I have possessed some of the most iconic electric, and acoustic, stringed instruments sought and known – coveted by many, possessed by few, used by even fewer … man, it's a wonderful world !

The living room in 1969 – Berkeley, California

1939 D-45 .. 1941 and 1944 D-28's ..

1917 - Gibson F4 mandolin (sold to David Crosby as gift for Jerry Garcia)

1939 Dobro - 1930's ca. National 

Fender Jaguar (bought used for $45 1969 – sold for $60 in 1971)

2 Gibson - Teens/ 20's - A mandolins 

SS Stewart Banjo Mandolin - (with all the battles of WW1  written on the head )

Watched the live upside down moon landing on that "ol' Philco" TV - July 1969 ! 

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Footnotes

** footnote : a university of Bordeaux sponsored series of private chamber concerts by famous musicians and classical performers – such as I Solisti di Veneti and others – with well known instruments – Stradivari – Guarnieri – Amati .. etc

*** Footnote - the original cases for these were canvas or tooled leather and had a flap opening on the end – these usually have the stitching rot and ultimately the leather case disintegrates .. intact original cases are super rare – and of course this mandolin's original case suffered same fate and was lost decades ago ..  

Gibson Acoustic Engineer Lloyd Loar holding a 3 point Artist model

He redesigned the mandolin and his signed F-5 Mandolin  instruments made by 

Gibson from 1921-24 command extraordinary prices today .. some north of 

$ 260,000 - and Bill Monroe's in excess of $1 million 

To be continued ... stay tuned .. 

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Chapter 6 -Conclusion - NEVER sell to family ..!!!! by Anno Nymus 6 of 6

 

Chapter 6 - Conclusion

It should be noted ... Pat had a firm rule .. NEVER sell to family ..!!!!

Alas – he was a softy, and he broke it often for mum. Curiously, he never let me make any payments no matter what fancy car I wanted to buy! It was always a gift, or loaner ONLY, but no payments - period!

The 1961 Corvair 'Greenbriar' Van Episode

1961 Corvair Greenbriar Van.

Mum and sis drove it till it wouldn't play anymore and they had to send it back - thru some sleight of hand and hard core horse swapping - mom's brother, uncle Jerry ended up with it.  All this happened .. whilst I was away on my Federal World Tour and Get Away in Vietnam .. what a story goes along with that old Corvair … if the wheels could talk?

The Corvair was another stalwart car that made many long treks, and was a great camping van. It traveled many trips to Mexico, and even to Vancouver, and BC ! Alas, it always leaked a lot of oil .. and we finally had to give it back .. when it was finally in the shop more than on the road ! Pat gripe'd, but made good on his 'warranty'.

Rear mount,  air cooled engine 

A flexible cabin – Easily converted from seating to cargo. 

OK engine, but endless oil leak !

A real " Soldier "

*

He always groused in a friendly way, and said he should never have sold us any cars !! … saying it always cost him tons of money out of pocket to fix our situations. He knew we couldn’t pay on our own with our ultra tight budget .. so he covered it all .. groused a bit along the way of course in his kidding way, but he always made sure we were covered and well taken care of .. and secretly we were all very proud that he did – including him !!!

I think we got a Ford LTD Crown Victoria next – from Uncle Pat of course.

*

When I was 9 he gave me a ukulele for Christmas .. and whilst learning to play it for the next months, I dragged and carried it everywhere I went – in the car, to the park, inside outside .. anyplace but school, shower or the pool.

I plunked on it constantly .. learned and sang all sorts of union organizing, Pete Seeger, and Woodie Guthrie, and general fun campfire songs, like “ the Crawdad Song” .. “Froggie went a Courting” and such like – I mastered basic chords, and chord changes – I was on my way at 9!

Pat was a great uncle ! He always fixed me and the family as best he could. He really got me my start in music .. and kept us in cars … Music was Rockin'!! … Cars was Rollin' !!

Pat made me a genuine ... “Rock-er, 'n … Roll-er” ! ... 

... Bless Uncle Pat Forever - Scoundrel-ism Lives On   !!!

End

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All photos: free, public domain, or by permission

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Chapter 5 - Cars ! Cars ! Cars ! - My Glorious old Caddy ! by Anno Nymus 5 of 6

 

Chapter 5

Cars ! Cars ! Cars ! - My Glorious old Caddy !

1959 Caddy - mint green and white ...

... all the bells n whistles and then some!

"The Crew Canoe"

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Back in 1965 this was a real 'Land Yacht' cum 'Boat' – I drove it only on weekends for about a year!

My music pal Jim and I would 'camp' in it whilst visiting musician pals in SoCal over the weekends .. 

I would get the car on Friday night around 6 at Pat's car lot - on my weekend "Liberty" from Camp Pendleton .. then drive to Riverside, about an hour, pick Jim H up at March Air Force Base, then head to one of our musician friends to jam music - all over the Inland Empire  & Berdoo!

If we arrived too late to go inside and play music - which would happen from time to time - we would park in front of their house and crash in the Caddy! 

When everyone was up and stirring in the morning, we'd go inside for coffee and breakfast - then virtually play music all day, night, or weekend until someone would edge us toward the door, or just toss us out ! It seems that not everyone can appreciate the subtleties and nuances of a loud Bluegrass Banjo for hours on end ... but I digress !?

Worn out or down, we would crash in the now infamous “Crew Canoe” – as it was playfully called – when we were out of musicians to jam with .. usually from total exhaustion. Instruments safely stashed in huge trunk, we would make pallets for sleeping on the seats. It was like home - with an ice chest for drinks and snacks. Folks suggested a mailbox on the fender ! 

Jim had the back seat .. and I took the front .. it sure wasn’t that comfortable for sleeping .. not nearly long enough for us to stretch out. By pretzel-ing and sleeping at kittywhumpus angles, we could eke out enuff rest .. but we would wake next morning .. cramped and stove up .. but still rearin' to pick and jam ... with any souls around!  After a few cups of stout java … we were back into it .. music til we dropped. Sunday nights - it all went in reverse - Jim back to March Field, Me back to Pendleton.

Me jamming in a laundromat - 1965

Whenever we got tossed from someones house – when  mom had visitors, or dinner, or such – we would decamp to the ever popular nearest local 24 hour 'Washateria' or laundromat - great places for acoustic band practice! We could jam and play our acoustic stuff there - Banjo and Guitar - .. nobody around to bother - sound insulated .. warm .. and secure .. we would play till the wee hours ! 

The "Caddy " would be parked in front of the laundromat - the huge trunk held all the instruments and cases ! The ol' canoe was always beckoning to be used as a bunk house - whenever we dropped from exhaustion!

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All photos: free, public domain, or by permission

Chapter 4 - Yes ... sometimes there is a Free Ride ! by Anno Nymus 4 of 6

 

Chapter 4

Yes ... sometimes there is a Free Ride ! 

From 1965 thru 1969 Uncle Pat kept me driving neat old cars – for free!

I drove a fantastic array of used cars .. all classics now .. .. some you couldn’t give away back then, but worth tons 'o bux now as 'vintage' or 'classic's. Through the years 1965 – 69, – on weekend leave from the Marines at Camp Pendleton – I would ride the Greyhound bus to Santa Anna, in Orange County California, the walk to his car lot nearby.

So on Friday nights when I would show up, he'd toss me some keys on … and say drive that for the weekend ... or next few weeks ! It was a fungible floating free car loaner thang!

Often, when I'd bring a car back .. he'd toss me some other keys and say .. 'here ya go !'... with a big grin ! .. He always made sure I was covered for transportation … and would always toss in a full tank of gas, and a few cash bux too .. He really stepped up to the plate to a young me needing wheels !

Here are some notable loaners that came to be “trademarks” for me at various stages of my driving career.

1949 Chevy Bel-air – factory green, with windshield visor.

In 1965, this 1949 Chevy was antiquated and almost couldn’t be given it away.

Mine - used but running - had an un-fixable water pump leak. Drive-able, but only with a jug of water in the trunk, it overheated on all SoCal roads on a warm day. I would often have to pull over on the highways, to  top off the radiator water when the temperature gauge would go up too fast !  

In 1965 it sold as a used car for $350. Today this restoration sells in the $49,000 range!

*

Notable other cars from Uncle Pat ..

1951 Ford when I was a kid in Pennsylvania

Note the snazzy 'Fender Skirts' – all the rage in 1950's

*

Note: He promised me his black and red Ford - when I turned 16 … but, it was in a bad wreck just before my birthday, and went to the scrap heap!  .. it sure was bitchin' ! When I was picked up after school, all my friends envied it - everyone wanted a ride home!!

*

He always liked and drove Thunderbird’s He drove all of the different models over the years He died driving  his favorite T-Bird in a bad freeway accident. We were all Shocked and Saddened. As always it was totally unexpected. The only consolation , he was having the time of his life - business was booming - he loved every minute of his time with family and cars - and he was cruising in his favorite T-Bird.

It strikes that there is an odd symmetry to his passing in a car accident; cars were his life - and death. Cars revolved around him and his life revolved around cars! He lived like he wanted to - Fast, Fun, Free, and 'his way'  ! 

He was one of a kind. What a great Uncle! 

*

We already wrote about “Napoleon” The stalwart 1950 Plymouth Suburban that Pat sold us. 

see post: More Interesting Cars I've known by Anno Nymus

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All photos: free, public domain, or by permission

Chapter 3 - 'Count the Marbles'? by Anno Nymus 3 of 6

 

Chapter 3

TV Adverts and Contests ... !

'Count the Marbles' ?

Pat did a lot of TV advertising .. his biggest competitor was Cal Worthington .. so he did a lot of flashy cheap ads .. usually with contests where you would have to come onto the car lot to enter.

He always had contests. He was caught short several times when customers actually WON the contests... !! .. he had outrageous payoffs and prizes .. expecting no one could ever actually win .. but I know 2 times they did .. and he was chagrined...  had to pay them both off – but usually weaseled his way out or around,  - except for the one weightlifter who really won, and the day he lost his marbles!

The contest was to carry a 100 pound weight for approximate 2 miles - on a course of city streets - held straight out from the chest … arms fully extended. 

 They thought no one could do it .. but a “Mr. America” type body builder – a local champion .. with guns the size of Chicago .. tried .. and actually DID IT !?!? .. Pat had to give him a car !! That was well publicized and in the papers and local TV news.

How Many Marbles in the Jar ?

This next one he told me about himself .. when I was about 23 years old and just out of the Marines – back from 'Nam . The almost disastrous 'Count The Marbles In The Jar' contest ... where he nearly got busted?!

They had a huge Ginger Jar with lid - full of marbles in the showroom .. and the contest was to guess the exact amount of marbles in the jar – for a free car ! Put your guess on a card .. drop in barrel .. if you have EXACT number – you win a nice car !

He did heavy TV advertising, and it brought lots of folks and “Looky-Lou's”, but it sold a lot of used cars too. He was doing his best version of 'Cal Worthington'.

Shock of shocks .. one customer had submitted a ticket with the exact number !?!?!?

It matched the official count card in the safe .! ? He had guessed the exact number!? What to do Percy ?

The time was approaching to announce the winner - the press and TV were there. 

Pat hemmed, 'n hawed stalled as long as he could, but the press, and waiting crowd were getting anxious – it was past time to award the prize. Thinking quickly, he said the official count card was still locked in the safe, but and the ONLY person with the combination - the accountant - had just left on a two week Hawaiian honeymoon cruise. There was no way to contact her. The only thing to do was have to RECOUNT of all the marbles - in front of the press!

This would prove the contest was a legit  – and tamp down the grousing and growing shouts of  'rigged',  BUT .. for security, Pat said they would need to " ... count the marbles in the back secure counting room" ... the jar would have to be moved.

Then whilst carrying the monster jar of glass - with his ad hoc crew of cronies making it as confusing as possible .. juggling and struggling with it  to get it  away from the TV cameras, and back into to the 'counting area'. 

In all the hubbub, he managed to “palm” a few extra marbles into the jar - whilst they carried the jar to the counting room. The confusion was the cover!

When they finally finished counting all the thousands of marbles, in front of the press – a few long hours later – they mysteriously 'found'  more marbles than on the customers ticket !? - Oh too bad

“Sorry Charlie – you lose !!

Pat didn’t have to give him the fancy car – but there was so much grousing that the contest was rigged – with shouts from the waiting crowd- and the growing curiosity of the police, that the better part of valor was to offer a decent different car. This was a live remote TV broadcast from his car lot ... with a large crowd waiting to hear the results! 

Spectators were agitating for the cops ought to get involved. Just then, like a miracle, another nice car was offered as a consolation prize. 

This was acceptable to the worried ticket holders – and to the cops - so all was settled to satisfaction .. but a very close shave at that !! Pat was out 2 cars ultimately! Hoist by his own Petard,or more correctly -  marbles! 

Pat quit doing contests after that !

*

Don't lose your marbles !

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All photos: free, public domain, or by permission

Chapter 2 - The Used Car Lot 'Game' ! by Anno Nymus 2 of 6

 

Chapter 2

 Pat and his Car Lot 'Games' !

*

Our relationship would mostly revolve around transportation, cars, and the used car lot after I turned 12, but my 'car buying and selling' lessons awaited, and unfolded daily once I could drive. He kept me abreast of his latest schemes, scams or hot tips! I soon discovered that he was really about one step away from being a carnival barker- side show huckster - con man, and flimflam  artiste ... all rolled into one!

 He had the gift of gab, a hint of larceny, with a generous amount of charisma, and silver tongued skills enough  to sell  ice to Alaska! Somehow, he could make a $5 profit - on a $2 dollar deal!? He was a hustler - He was gen-u-wine ! 

He carried a cashiers check for $1 million dollars in his briefcase!

His game ? 

 When he would try to pay an invoice with it in person ... 

 ... if they couldn’t give him change ... he asked folks for credit !!

It worked !! 

He got a LOT of credit on the spot when he flashed it, and used it to his advantage in every deal! 

*

*

Pat bought a lot of cars to stock his huge and successful car lot in downtown Santa Anna! He would plan buying trips to other dealers on Thursdays, where he could often buy $40 - $80 thousand dollars worth of cars, or more at a time. That was a whole lot for the 60's ... since these cars generally retailed  from $800 - $1800 each - upper middle class rides. He would buy them for about half of retail. He made a lot of profit ! 

Here's how it worked.

Once he found a Car Dealer where he wanted to buy, he would line up a bunch of drivers to go with him.  He used granddad and myself a lot, but all warm bodies were welcomed or recruited. "Do you know anyone else who can drive?". 

There was always a motley crew of whomever could be rounded up for buying-driving day. 

Before cell phones, it was only land line calls on rotary phones ! Dialing for Drivers ! 

No answer? Keep going down the list of candidates .. call until you have enuff drivers for the buying trip. There were a lot of logistics to setting up a big car buy at another dealer. Money talked. 

For the then princely sum of about $25, he would get a driver for a day. Depending how badly drivers were  needed, the offer could be sweetened. 

We had a lot of language barriers as well. Pat's car lot was like a little international gathering, he had employees of all racial and ethnic types and languages, from salesmen .. to lot boys. On driving day .. if you were licensed, and  available .. you were tagged ! There were always a few drivers who got 'lost' on the way back .. running hours late, or even the next day claiming language problems, or a wrong turn on the confusing freeway interchanges.

Most of us would straggle back to Pats car lot over the next few hours. I was always amused that some didn't make it back at all !?  

I found out later - he let some drivers take the cars home, and enjoy them for personal use - even take the family out to dinner and a movie ...  "just bring the car in the morning!" -  That was one of his famous  'sweetened offers! He really was a 'softie' in his own way! 

Once we were all at the designated car lot where he was buying, he would then commence to walking the lot and  deciding which cars were going back with us  ... basically what to put in his basket! If it was clean and shiny, he could flip it fast, a key criteria ! If a thumbs up, he would assign a driver. 

Pretty soon we would have a line of cars - a dozen or so all in a row .. waiting for the signal to pull out. We learned to expect the drive out signal whilst he was in the office - 'doing the paperwork'. 

Once everything was ready to caravan out - he would carefully time the transaction - so they would be IN the office. Once everyone was sitting in the Mangers Office - he would signal thru the showroom window for us to pull out quickly  – his cue meant - DRIVE OFF NOW !!!

We would then drive off quickly as possible, with a dozen or so cars .. and this would usually leave the car dealer or sales manger sputtering  watching the best cars having just been cherry-picked and driving off!! Meanwhile ... 

Pat would be handing them his $1 Million dollar Cashiers Check and saying .. "Here ! ... don't worry about the cars .. just give me the change!" 

What a heckuva trick ...“ say buddy got change for a $1 million dollar cashiers check ?”

He sure was a hustler …This was his usual buying M.O. .... 

You dont really have to be a Mensa Genius  ... just saying... 

*

Back at his car lot, Pat would harangue and hustle his salesmen to sell out all the latest cars that we just brought in "Last in /First Out - over this weekend !!" His bank account was always tight, and he would have to sell the cars fast to cover the purchase, and beat the check to bank! 

He demanded that his salesmen would HAVE to raise enough money to 'beat the invoice', or, 'a post dated check' that he might offer to leave for reassurance to the sputtering Car Dealer, and Sales Manager ! The car tailights were disappearing down the road, and A post dated check was on the table for the full amount! 

He was very successful .. lots of Glengarry Glen-Ross high pressure sales stuff on his own lot and staff - he usually had about 30 salesmen watching the lot! In the sales office there was an easel with a leader board of top salesmen - showing how many cars sales cinched -  'for sure',  'hot prospects' and 'how many sold ' that week!  ..  flip - flop - and fly! ..1st prize is the set of steak knives .. 2nd prize - you're out! 

Lined up - ready to pull out - on the signal ! 

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All photos: free, public domain, or by permission

Chapter 1 - Uncle Pat & the “Used Car Lot” by Anno Nymus 1 of 6

[Editor's Note: Who is Uncle Pat?

RobertD (Sr) was the spouse of Mrs. B.  Uncle Pat was the youngest brother of RobertD (Sr) and was a  brother-in-law to MrsB.  He was always known by his nickname: Uncle Pat, even though that was not his true name.  He was an uncle to KimB and RobertD (Jr). The brothers grew up in Pennsylvania. Uncle Pat moved to California.]

 

Chapter 1

 Uncle Pat's “Used Car Lot " 

Automotive Reflections on So Cal – 'back in the day' 

by Anno Nymus

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Scoundrel-ism ?

*

Uncle Pat was a scoundrel ! In all fairness, a loveable, gregarious, and good hearted soul, but a scoundrel none the less ! His scoundrely-ness was fairly benign – no one ever got hurt, and it always worked out in the end 'somehow', but Pat was always ... 'working the odds', and 'sanding the edges' !

I only have wonderful memories of Uncle Pat – met him when I was 7 or so, visiting back east. He was dad's younger brother – in his mid twenties then – and according to grandad and grandma .. the 'wild one' ! I was looking forward to meeting him – Dad had often regaled me with stories of his escapades and high jinx growing up – he was my kind of guy !

From the very start, my connection with Pat started with, and thenceforth always involved, cars.

The first time I met Pat – was in Pennsylvania, where I was visiting my grandparents – his parents. I was about 7 or 8. He was about 25 ish - I had been very excited to meet my dads youngest brother, so planned to hang around him like a puppy dog.

He needed to watch me on the first day I arrived, but he also had to go pick up his new car parts from the body shop. He was having 'fender skirts' made and then installed. I was baffled .. skirts on a car !? 

He asked ..did I want to ride along ? .. d'oh !! .. after the wild stories .. of course !!!

Wow – we just met, and I got to ride in his new Ford! Pat was terrific – telling me all about the car .. what fender skirts* were. We talked sports and such. He quickly became a true dutch uncle .. taking me to the malt shop for a black n white shake later, and pretty much treating me like a younger brother ! This was looking good !

I was fascinated at the body shop. I had been around a lot of automotive shops – visiting mom's dad, and brothers (who were professional auto mechanics – and ran a big and popular Flying A Gas station ). The body shop was neat, and caught my interest.I was amazed at how they smoothed out the wrinkles n dents in steel, and made it look new again.

After the fender skirts were done to Pats satisfaction and installed, we went cruising' to show 'em off .. he drove around to some of his buddies houses .. and they all raved appropriately … … and then after that .. a malted at the Ice Cream Fountain with a real Soda Jerk!. Then we headed back. I was happy !

*

Fender skirts were all the rage in the early 50's - they streamlined the undercarriage line across the rear  wheels !

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All photos: free, public domain, or by permission

Part 1 -- Digital Tones and Pavlov’s Dog – A New Language ? - 'Beep-speak' ? by Anno Nymus

 

Digital Tones and Pavlov’s Dog – A New Language ?

An exploration of our times - with tongue mildly planted in cheek  

by Anno Nymus

"In 1927, Ivan Pavlov experimented with his dog on the subject of psychological training—specifically conditional stimuli and response. He found that when he rang a bell each time before he fed his dog, the dog no longer salivated in response to the food, but to the bell."

A conditional response is when you're trained to respond to something such as Pavlov's Bell as opposed to using simply your reflexes.” * – Urban Dictionary

*

'Hotel California', an album recorded by the Eagles, (greatest selling album of the 1970's), used a subliminal ringing phone
at the end of a long passage to refocus your attention to the next lyric !

*

This was my first personal experience with social engineering --  using audio tones. At the time I thought it was very clever. We have all been programmed since childhood to answer a phone quickly, so we get a vague sense of urgency to respond to a subliminal ringing phone. Folks then take a mental beat to give the issue some unconscious attention unaware they are seeking a source for the ringing phone. Thus we have a physical reaction that makes us 'look' !? Hmmm ?? This is what brought Pavlov and his famous dog to mind.

I think the social engineering folks have sussed this pretty well .. and the folks who brought you the cloud, might now be programming us - subliminally -- are we taking the bait? Now the stimulus is overt – outright notification tones and alerts emitted by our devices.

Have you ever raced or fumbled to answer an insistently ringing phone? Do you get a mild rush of anxiety when you just barely miss that call ? The area of emotional manipulation by alerts, is a growing phenomenon worth looking into.

Example: A notification triggers a sense of urgency (and probably some adrenaline .. further fueling the sense of urgency – metaphorical salivation?). Youth especially are committed to the social media phenomenon, and some research suggest there may be a chemical-endorphin 'reward' component to their compulsion to achieve notices and comments with constant alerts? Everyone has their own personalized tones, beeps, squawks, and alerts, or silent-vibration mode to catch every notification possible. Any group today will have a stew of phones and notification tones going off.

Since the advent of of the digital age it seems our lives are continuously driven by endless notifications and digital sounds throughout our personal 'audio-dome' - environment.

Noise Pollution - and our personal 'Audio-Dome' 

There is an area of research called Noise Pollution, which deals with social problems created by digital sounds.

In the ER, folks have to instantly assess, understand, and react to the meanings of the various equipment tones, alarms, and beeps ! But there is a serious “Catch 22”. Many of the machines use similar tones for opposite functions or conditions, or opposite tones for the same functions. Noise Pollution, can literally be dangerous !

Each of us has a palette of notification tones programmed into our sundry devices. Each notification or silent buzz , has meaning to us. It's our own code, and we know how to process each notification. We ingest a panoply of alerts, consciously, or subliminally in our daily personal activities. This constitutes our personal Digital Noise - Audio Pollution Dome.

"Beepspeak" ? - A new language ?

I think Digital Noise Pollution has become a new kind of unspoken 'digital language' in a curious way : an audio pollution-collusion, contusion, and intrusion that I like to call “Beepspeak” !

This 'Beepspeak' brings me to think again of Pavlov! Epiphany ! Have we been programming ourselves, whilst programming our devices ?!? Perhaps in doing so, have we made ourselves 'digital' Pavlovian dogs ??

You can't put the poop - back in the horse. We sure would be in a mess without these notifications. The world would grind to a halt in short order, but where is all this notification taking us ?

Is this digital cacophony some weird mystical new unspoken language or tower of babel ? Could this be presaging some digital “AI bot” take over by programming us to react to various notifications?

No voting required madam, the computer voted for you – with who it thought you liked – based on your notification history ? 

The sky is falling ! – the sky is falling !

 

Beeps, alerts and tones control us more than we would like to admit. We continue to program ourselves to jump at an alert – whose sound demands and insists, that we react !

Do we need to be concerned ? What does this unseen phenomena signify? Where is this digital whirlwind of alerts taking us? What are we becoming because of it ? What – if anything – should, or can be, done about it? Hmmm … Tag ! You're 'It' !

Mysteries yet abound doncha know ? Thanks Pavlov for leading us to this new “Beepspeak” !

What are your devices telling you ?

Riiiinnnnnngg ! ! !

... still scratching my head over the future, 

so with tongue firmly planted in cheek ..  

until next time .. 

Anno Nymus

* * * * *

Good Bye Mr Crane - Hello Summer and Junior High

 

Good bye Mr. Crane – Hello Summer, and Junior High !

by Anno Nymus

*

Mr Crane our 6^th grade Home-room teacher was called out of the room into the hall to speak with another teacher. We were sternly instructed to remain quietly seated and read, while he stepped into the hallway for a moment. He could see us thru the window in the door, and we could see him chatting up the other teacher out in the hall.

whilst he was out of the room .. the class clown ... Albert C ..slowly rose out of his seat in a half crouch, while eyeballing the discussion in the hall thru the little window...

His sudden movement got all our attention. We could see him gauging how much time he had before Mr Crane stepped back into the room, and then he suddenly rose, seeing that Mr Crane had his back to the room for a moment.

Albert rushed up to Mr Crane's desk … put something down, and scurried back to his front row seat to avoiding detection, then doing the classic silent whistling – 'I didn’t do anything', and innocently glancing around the room. Exactly as he was sitting back down, Mr. Crane came back in, and slightly detected the movement and sensed something was up ..

We had no clue what Albert had put on the desk, but he was chortling to himself and sort of indicating we should watch what happens next.

You have to appreciate that Albert was a burgeoning juvenile delinquent.

Albert was always in trouble, but had a cavalier attitude about it. He was a skilled liar - having much experience talking his way out of various jams: smoking, loitering in the hall and generally moving at his own tempo. He probably grew up to be a gangster – or a lawyer. Albert was a clown , and had a bit of 'I can get away with it' swagger in his walk.

Let me describe the Home Room

As we faced front, Mr Crane's desk was on the far left facing the class with the big blackboard behind him. His desk was along the front wall of 7 foot windows with transoms, overlooking the front lawn.

This was Home Room, a checking in room for an hour before regular classes, where roll was taken and announcements and notices read, and last minutes could be applied to homework needing to be completed (or quickly copied) -- to hand in later that day.

All of us were about 12-13 years old – and mostly boys – but typically unruly as we were wont to be in the late 1950's – being 'rock n roll rebels' in Hollywood … and flexing our new found rebelliousness and increasing disregard for regulations. We were often shocking the old folks.

First bell rang at 6:50, meaning 10 minutes to get to your room, get settled and seated by the 7 o'clock bell.. To Mr Crane, Home Room started at 7 sharp!

When the bell rang, we were to be in our seats, sitting up, alert, quiet, and paying rapt attention to the front notices on the blackboard, while Mr Crane would commence taking the roll !

We did none of those things!!!

He would berate and harangue any infractions, and woe unto late comers or stragglers – they were to be in their assigned seat, attentive, quiet, and ready for the day before the bell rang at 7! 

We didn’t do that.

The Permanent Record &  Taking The Roll

Mr Crane – old, be-speckled, and befuddled .. seemed about 85 to us and as alien as someone from another century – which he was – and frequently reminded us that we were his very last home room class. He was looking forward to retiring. We were glad, and couldn't wait.. he was literally .. stern and far too OLD SCHOOL !!

He was a few years past his ability to control the class. Authoritarian efforts attempted – to no avail . He was set in cement . We were incorrigible.

He was what we thought of as strict and mean – which now I appreciate as probably old age. To us he didn’t appreciate anything new or different – it was the 1950's!

Life was rockin' n rollin' just like our new battery powered transistor radios ! The media for social interaction of the 50's. It bumfuzzled Mr C if you were listening to a radio waiting for the opening bell.

We would gang around the person with the best transistor radio .. and we'd listen to radio KFWB – channel 98 - DJ's spinning those platters... in the hall waiting for the bell.

Records 'n Spinning Platters : 78 rpm was being replaced by 45 rpm for us kids n teens, and 33 rpm hi-fi long play for the adults . The world was changing ,and Mr Crane – with his charge of inquisitive and motivated students – wasn’t up to the challenge. we were his last class.

We got the 1930 stuff... but needed the 1950 stuff …  he thought a lot differently than we did... I now realize that was just a massive generational gap. He expected us to be like his 1930 students. He had started in 1928, and had been teaching for 30 years by 1958 !

We were definitely not like his 1930 students! Especially with Albert leading the mischief.

Now... Back to the story.

Albert just barely got into his seat when Mr C came back in – immediately sensing something was up.He went toward his desk – with the precious Log Book ... scanning the class for hints of what was up !?

Before I proceed, and reveal what Mr Crane was about to see, it should here be noted that his cursive penmanship was magnificent!

Penmanship

His Roll Book - “ The Master Log”, was flowery and beautiful. He had perfect cursive, and used an old dip pen .. that old kind with gold nibs that you dipped into an ink well. It looked like he had written the Declaration of Independence. 

His attendance book was meticulously kept .. every entry perfectly scribed – Present/Here, Tardy/late, sick , excuses, grades .. a perfect log book. He prided himself on how well he kept the attendance record. It was in fact our 'permanent record' he would say .. so he took great care to make each quill penned entry perfect .. and blotted.

We mostly all took great care to avoid that any negative entries be made about us … it was after all the 'permanent record' .. well, all except for Albert and the incorrigible bunch – a small group that took another tack. They thrived on how many entries they had !

Note here that Mr Crane's weapon of control was --  the constant threat of making an entry in the attendance book under our name ! A typical threat might include picking up the book to demonstrate intent .. and if serious .. reach for the dip pen! The threat of entry in this book .. did surprisingly well to keep most of us mild -1950's rebels -  at bay .. except for Albert.

Important Aside: we must here note – The Farmers Market

We lived pretty close to the famous Farmers Market by the CBS TV studios .. and we often wandered thru the stalls window shopping and looking at the various products after school or lazy weekends, but a favorite stall .. was the scientific and gag toy shop .. solar driven whirlygigs .. tin spoonbill birds , endlessly and repeatedly dipping their beaks into a glass of water – popping up and doing it over n over. Of course to 12 year olds guys, the rubberized plastic, realistic looking .. fake barf / fake dog poop / fake pee puddles held special scatological allure, and potential laughs galore ! Wow !! They look so real !!

This is about the place I should mention – this was the last day of school before summer! Only 6 classes to go and … FREEDOM !!! but first … one last Home Room ..ugh .. and 45 more minutes … tick tock tick tock …

Back to the tale …

Albert is smugly watching as Mr Crane approaches his desk .. stops cold .. turns beet red .. faces the class .. and says .. 

“Who threw up on my desk ????? “ SPEAK UP .. THAT IS DISGUSTING .. STEP UP NOW AND CLEAN THIS UP !!! NOW !!!

Mr C was .. tapping his toes .. we all squirmed uncomfortably – but now we know what Albert did .. and its a riot .. but we are smart enuff to stifle the chuckles .. but its tough .. He thinks its real .. we know it cant be !

Mr C is pacing and fuming now .. “OK I'm going to get the Principal and we will settle this once and for all .. whoever is responsible will be held accountable .. the Master Log book is ruined !!!

He turned and left the room to fetch the Principal ..!

Quick as a rabbit .. Albert jumps up .. runs to the desk and grabs the rubberized fake barf .. holds is up and shows it to all of us, then throws it out the 7 foot window transom .. and it fly’s out toward the front lawn  into some bushes ..

Albert returns to his seat giggling .. we are all laughing and hooting. Soon Mr Crane and the Principal return … and we instantly sit bolt upright, silent, and awaiting doom! 'Rapt' would be about it !

Mr Crane says to the Principal “come here and see what they did to the Master Log Book !” … and then notices that nothing is amiss .. and starts too look around .. seeing that nothing is wrong .. no barf !?!?! … now he IS bumfuzzled .. and the Principal is a bit disconcerted .. what IS going on here Mr Crane ?

Mr Crane demands to know who 'cleaned it up '?? … no one stirs .. and clearly the Log isn’t wet or damp .. with no sign of anything awry .. The Principal soon exits scratching his head, ..

Mr Crane is taken aback and sits down in total consternation .. he asks a few of the teacher pets if they know anything .. no one speaks up …

We get a lecture on civil manners and courtesy, rules of social behavior, and social norms not to be broken, or taken lightly .. then we were told to work quietly till the bell rings.

Mr C sits down .. looks directly at Albert .. says .. "I know you were behind this .. but I cant figure out how you cleaned it up !? … I'm glad this is my last day!".

Just then the bell rang .. Albert jumped up .. Yelled "HAPPY SUMMER !" .. and raced out the door escaping any further 3rd degree… we all thanked Mr Crane , and  wished him a good summer .. and ...left the 6^th grade !

Next stop Summer and Junior High !

We all had a good laugh at Mr Cranes expense – no harm no foul – the precious LOG BOOK OF LIFE was still virginal .. but there it was .. summer was on us and we didn’t have time to be contrite .. that bit catches up with us all …much later.

I sometimes wonder if Albert became a politician, gangster or famous attorney!? Mr Crane got out at the right time, and all I know is that I escaped elementary school,  and I was now looking forward to joining  the junior toilet washer brigade - as we called the 7th graders !? 

Hello Junior High .... and ... Summer here we come !!! 

End